What should we do, wear black arm bands and mourn the greedy pigs, clueless senile moles and Dutch douche bags that put almost all of them out of business?
No? We're supposed to rush into the snotty little "niche" stores that survive! Most of them are owned by obnoxious "hipsters" and loaded with over-priced pseudo-collectors items nobody really wants or needs. A thousand pressings helps nobody, and one day a year doesn't pay the rent. No, the damage done by Internet thieves who call themselves "sharers" and self-centered pigs who grin and say they're "pirates" is permanent.
Musicians, singers and songwriters will NEVER have the prestige or payment available before the age of killer copying. Today, even big shots good or bad, from Dylan to McCartney to Kiss to Manilow have to think twice about releasing an album, and many know that all they can hope for is some kind of loss leader to help them make money on a tour, and most tours now require so much literal fireworks and dancers and promotion even bitches like Madonna are worried about what will happen. Many a Britney has had to cancel dozens of shows or scale back to smaller arenas and let personnel go.
Record Store Day? One pathetic day?
Judging from what one author considers the pick of "music snob Christmas," the so-called "vinyl renaissance" is strictly for the small-time clique of the clueless...jerks in their 20's who dress like Elvis Costello did 40 years ago. Yeah, LOVE the fucking porkpie hats and the horn rimmed glasses, dudes.
"Record Store Day" was reported on the same page as an ad for varicose vein repair.
I'm supposed to care about a live version of "Take On Me" by A-Ha, because it's (gasp) a picture disc. I think the novelty of picture disks peaked about 1976.
Other important items to rush to the record store for: a presumably limited edition of CDs by the shitty Flaming Lips, a vinyl single from "Black Star" shaped like a black star, and "R.I.P." the supposedly lost third album from The Zombies. "Well let me tell you about the way it looks." CRAPPY. I don't need any of this shit.
In most cases I already have it. Miles Davis is not hard to find, not the original vinyl, not the re-issues. There probably isn't a sneaky forum on the Net that wouldn't have outtakes from The Zombies, and I'm sure that if there's anything unique on this "Record Store Day" item, well, whoop-de-do for the thousand "hipsters" who bought it. Somebody will be uploading it all over the place for FREEEEEEEEE. And do you suppose anyone in the original band is making a dime on this?
Years ago, there was no shortage of "trick" albums on vinyl. Now that "hipsters" are willing to pay $30 for a "limited pressing," a few examples of this not-so-cheap trick have come back. Mr. Strudel, er, Mr. Spuhler, points out "RPM Turntable Baseball," in which you put the needle down, and you have no idea if it'll land on a groove that shouts "Home Run" or "Strikeout." Wowie zowie. In this age of video games and date rape, "hipsters" are really going to be enthralled dropping a needle on a groove? How many times?
Among the many things that irritate me, are the times when well-intentioned morons come up to me and say, "You must be pleased, vinyl is making a comeback!" I tell them, "You read it in a newspaper, but that doesn't mean it's the truth."
The proof is how few new record stores have opened, and how few new releases are available in the vinyl format at all. There are also fewer and fewer releases, period. As for stars from past eras, like Al Stewart or Steve Miller, they either record on their own label or they don't record at all. Either they have enough money to take a loss or break even, or they are in retirement. Many are counting themselves lucky that at one time they had a major label so they have money in the bank.
Most artists, young or old, can't even get a record deal at all, and many can only knock off demos they float to Spotify. Then they're hopeful that they get enough "hits" to convince some sullen nightclub owner to let them play without having to pay. Some roll the dice and pray that a song they uploaded gets picked up for a movie soundtrack...one of the few ways of getting paid a decent price.
Meanwhile entire genres of music, like "novelty," no longer exist. People who made a living by working in the studio for a month, putting out a great record and NOT touring...are no longer making a living that way. When was the last time Firesign Theater was on a major label? Why is it that even famous classical orchestras don't get to go into a studio and do their definitive version of a symphony? Oh, but "Record Store Day" is changing all that. NOT. It's just something stupid for Mr. Spurious, er, Mr. Spuhler, to fill some space with. It's more likely he'll end up fired and waiting for "Pay a Writer Day" than for "Record Store Day" to actually catch on or turn a profit.
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