NELSON MANDELA - BIGGER THAN JESUS

Once upon a time, John Lennon was nearly crucified for saying that The Beatles were having more influence over teenagers than Jesus Christ. Which was a fact.

Kids all over the world were going berserk at Beatles concerts. They weren't doing that in church. Most weren't even going to church.

Nevermind. This past ten days, we've been told that NELSON MANDELA is bigger than Christ. Or...at the very least, CHRIST'S EQUAL.

You want to know what the fuck this grief-fest is really all about? Want to hear it from an authentic source? Someone BLACK? Then read this. It'll wash your brain:

THERE.

Not since Jesus walked on the water has there been such a man as NELSON MANDELA.

Christ, there really should be churches built to worship him. Catholics say that some people are actually SAINTS. And the Pope is infallible. Muslims say ALLAH-Kazam, everybody better worship him or die. PS, don't draw a picture of Mohamed, you'll die for that, too.

So why not declare Mandela to be God's illegitimate black stepchild? Hmmmmmm?

It's not enough to say he was a fairly good guy, an inspiration to SOME, and maybe one of our less corrupt Presidents of a country.

Any Brits out there say that Winston Churchill was a great man who CHANGED THE WORLD? Any Americans out there say that Abraham Lincoln CHANGED THE WORLD? Any other countries have EVER had a leader that people outside the country should humbly mewl and grovel about and mourn because they had an impact in a country thousands of miles away??

According to this guy, Mandela CHANGED THE WORLD because in South Africa, IN HIS OPINION, the guy showed "grace, humility, strength and forgiveness...He was love."

He fucked around a lot. That what you mean by "he was love?"

Uh, no. Here's the other part of the article, which further explains why the whole world had to forget about everything else and declare Mandela to be GOD and JESUS and a WORLD CHANGER.

Hell, the man was another GANDHI.

"It was unconditional love that allowed him to save and transform South Africa."

Yeah? Even on the news, the 30 minute national news shows that acted like nothing else in the world mattered except to yammer on and on about Mandela's death...some interviews showed South Africans admitting their lifestyle is shit, that crime is rampant, and that they aren't ALL that much better off than they once were...and that they lag behind a LOT of other countries.

"He personified love on a level only approached by the likes of Gandhi."

Oh, fuck off. You might as well say Linda Lovelace personified love. What are you smoking?

Mandela is great because of his "endless love for humanity?"

Jimmy Carter also has a love for humanity. The old fart is spending his life building houses for poor people. When he pops off, is ANYONE in their right mind going to compare him to Christ or Gandhi? NO. They are NOT. Are they going to say that he CHANGED THE WORLD, rather than he made life a bit easier for some poor people in a few towns nobody ever heard of? Is BBC news going to devote their entire broadcast on a news day to him? FUCK NO.

Next, this clown gives us one of his "favorite Mandela stories."

The wonderful story is that a guy in prison (you want to tell us what he was jailed for, and why he was considered "a dangerous terrorist") didn't want to clean the toilets. So Mandela decided to help him.

Well, Jesus Christ, hello. Mandela could've walked on a bucket of shit, which really would've proved he was supernatural, but hell, making friends with another con...that "revealed compassion - and love."

Hey, ever hear of the Birdman of Alcatraz? He also CHANGED THE WORLD? Because he wrote a book about birds while locked up?

"He graced our planet for 95 years. He changed the world..."

Right. Australia is different because of him. Libya. Denmark. Sweden. Tell me, what part did Nelson Mandela play in creating the Internet? How did he influence Pirate Bay into stealing music and movies? How did his compassion affect the leader of North Korea in killing his own ex-girlfriend? How did his LOVE change Putin and prevent him from putting Pussy Riot and so many others in jail? Mandela was unjustly jailed and...that shit is still happening.

No, not enough to just say that this guy was courageous, or did a few good things for his people. You have to fuck it out of all proportion and make this guy into a martyr, a Christ, a Gandhi...and one fucking prison anecdote is the chosen example!

Well FUCK the world because if you think he changed the world, then it can't get any better

FUCK the world, because if you mourn a guy who wasn't in power in 20 years, or even coherent at the time of his death at a ripe old age, and insist he was like Gandhi and we're not going to see anyone like him again, you're saying we have no other leaders we can rely on.

FUCK the world. Now that the euphoria of the celeb-mourning is over, maybe it's time for people to take off the blinders, and SEE CLEARLY again.

The world is BROWN. Not Mandela brown. SHIT BROWN. There is chaos, violence and law-breaking all over the world and most certainly all over the Internet, and the last thing you find much of is LOVE.

I think the Pope is actually trying to do some good things, spread some love, but hey, he's not the right color or religion is he? So FUCK him too, right?