Shauna Cuntwell's new FIVER campaign

SHAUNA CUNTWELL recently called up her ex-manager, Bill Hoobastank. She was moaning, "Nobody will pay for my music! Nobody wants to use me as a model on FIVERRRRR. Nobody will pay me to do voice-overs for them! Why is that?" 

And Bill said, "Gurgle gurgle gurgle!" Which made almost as much sense as her mumbling Irish accent, which sounds like a duck farting into a bathtub full of beer. Bill sent her an email with a link to a SUCCESSFUL bitch on Fiver:

The idea of making a lot of MONEY trumped Shauna's innate slum prudery. 

She decided to take the plunge, and do something with NUDITY!!

With the help of ace photographer Cilla Blackledge, and some lipstick, Shauna has been experimenting with the right slogans that might get guysssss to pay her for pictures!

Coming soon, her new ad campaign: "Pay me a fiverrrr and I'll write your name over my belly button!" I'll make it seem like I charge for everyone but YOU! Like...
I'M A WHORE...but for TAYLOR SWIFT...I'm a SLUT!