Wednesday, November 7, 2018
Disgusted by what passes for Amusement?
Hey Blackpool, HERE'S yer ILLUMINATIONS! Shine a light on THIS....
Sunday, April 22, 2018
What do you say to a little fuck?
You say, "that was kind of short."
What better way to celebrate the demise of Verne, who was once filmed drunkenly pissing, than to see him haplessly humping?
Nice to know there are women who find somebody who isn't even three feet tall so appealing. Then again, his bank account was hefty.
What better way to celebrate the demise of Verne, who was once filmed drunkenly pissing, than to see him haplessly humping?
Nice to know there are women who find somebody who isn't even three feet tall so appealing. Then again, his bank account was hefty.
Sunday, April 1, 2018
It's called EASTER, Habib...
"Habib, you just do NOT understand...
"In the West, it's ok to make fun of your religious heroes. Christ or Moses, it's ALL hilarious. Now, Easter, if you don't know, has to do with Christ coming back from the dead. Naturally the Easter bunny and chocolate eggs and candy and over-eating and wearing silly parade hats and getting drunk...is part of the celebration. Christ's deaths is all about...The Easter Bunny. Christ's birth? Oh, that's about an obese bastard in a red suit urging people to over-eat and go bonkers over getting free shit.
"Here, take a look at some photos...
"Now you get it, Habib? Frankly, it would be nice if there was a mellow middle-ground between getting homicidal if somebody draws a Mohamed cartoon, and somehow relating Christ's resurrection to pulling twat lips. But hey, atheists don't get time off, and life on Earth is so miserable, all religious people live for is HOLIDAYS. YOU assholes have a whole fucking month of Ramming Dan, or whatever it is you do.
"Oh, sorry. Put the knife away. No offense intended. Just look at the photos. Jesus Fucking Christ. Hot bitches huh? Too bad your women are so damn ugly you put a bag over their entire bodies! I'm kidding...I'm kidding...have some jelly beans. All right, sure, you can dip them in hummus first..."
"In the West, it's ok to make fun of your religious heroes. Christ or Moses, it's ALL hilarious. Now, Easter, if you don't know, has to do with Christ coming back from the dead. Naturally the Easter bunny and chocolate eggs and candy and over-eating and wearing silly parade hats and getting drunk...is part of the celebration. Christ's deaths is all about...The Easter Bunny. Christ's birth? Oh, that's about an obese bastard in a red suit urging people to over-eat and go bonkers over getting free shit.
"Here, take a look at some photos...
"Now you get it, Habib? Frankly, it would be nice if there was a mellow middle-ground between getting homicidal if somebody draws a Mohamed cartoon, and somehow relating Christ's resurrection to pulling twat lips. But hey, atheists don't get time off, and life on Earth is so miserable, all religious people live for is HOLIDAYS. YOU assholes have a whole fucking month of Ramming Dan, or whatever it is you do.
"Oh, sorry. Put the knife away. No offense intended. Just look at the photos. Jesus Fucking Christ. Hot bitches huh? Too bad your women are so damn ugly you put a bag over their entire bodies! I'm kidding...I'm kidding...have some jelly beans. All right, sure, you can dip them in hummus first..."
ALLAH-KAZAM. The Mayor of London makes it MURDER CITY
ALLAH BLIMEY!
What GOOD news for London. They rival New York City...in MURDERS.
It should be especially gratifying to the gun nuts out there, to see that London's done it WITHOUT the use of Saturday Night Specials. Knives seem to be the weapon of choice. Now, hmmm....WHO are known for carrying knives? What group has a history of loving their ornate SWORDS? What backward part of the world has very little history of gun use before the 20th Century?
As is always the case, articles of this type are VERY discrete (or discreet) about what homicidal twats (rhymes with rats or pots) commit these crimes. Nobody is giving details as to whether this is white-on-white crime or brown-on-white crime or white-on-brown crime, and whether the demographic is Middle Eastern or North African lunatics, Jamaics or Pakis or "none of the above, boy-o, and let's have another beer and another chorus of 'Sweet Caroline.'"
All we know, to quote the late Flip Wilson, is that "the cost of living keeps going up, while the odds of living keep going down."
What GOOD news for London. They rival New York City...in MURDERS.
It should be especially gratifying to the gun nuts out there, to see that London's done it WITHOUT the use of Saturday Night Specials. Knives seem to be the weapon of choice. Now, hmmm....WHO are known for carrying knives? What group has a history of loving their ornate SWORDS? What backward part of the world has very little history of gun use before the 20th Century?
As is always the case, articles of this type are VERY discrete (or discreet) about what homicidal twats (rhymes with rats or pots) commit these crimes. Nobody is giving details as to whether this is white-on-white crime or brown-on-white crime or white-on-brown crime, and whether the demographic is Middle Eastern or North African lunatics, Jamaics or Pakis or "none of the above, boy-o, and let's have another beer and another chorus of 'Sweet Caroline.'"
All we know, to quote the late Flip Wilson, is that "the cost of living keeps going up, while the odds of living keep going down."
Saturday, March 31, 2018
Friday, March 30, 2018
SHAUNA EASTER
Cilla Blackledge, just in time for the holidays, premieres her new discovery...
SHAUNA EASTER.
Says Cilla, "I wanted to do something special for this wonderful holiday. It's such a cheerful event. You see, God knocked up a Jewish bitch, then watched his bastard son have a tough time of it. He was considered a Jew, after all. So they crucified him, and God didn't help one little bit.
"The Romans dumped the dead Jesus of Nazareth in a cave. Let's not get mad at the Romans. Let's pretend they were Jews. If we hate the Romans, we get no pizza. The good news: ho ho ha ha hee hee, he got himself resurrected. I'm not sure if HE did it or his Daddy actually did. I stopped going to Catholic school after the nuns beat me too often. They get cranky if the candle shipment is late.
"So, Jesus swooped the Earth NEVER to be seen again. Except by some fanatic cranks who have seen him on their toast and swimming in their porridge. Easter celebrates either the resurrection and him fleeing the Earth, or the fact that when he fled the planet, he didn't take all the marshmallows, and now we have so many we can shape them like Eggs and Bunnies. Wheee!
"Shauna Easter looks a bit like my old friend Shauna Cuntwell, but with normal sized eyes and a less goofy round face. Oh, she also actually HAS the top of her head intact. And isn't that shaved twat ADORABLE? Oh come let ye adore it...if you pay the going Sheffield price."
SHAUNA EASTER.
Says Cilla, "I wanted to do something special for this wonderful holiday. It's such a cheerful event. You see, God knocked up a Jewish bitch, then watched his bastard son have a tough time of it. He was considered a Jew, after all. So they crucified him, and God didn't help one little bit.
"The Romans dumped the dead Jesus of Nazareth in a cave. Let's not get mad at the Romans. Let's pretend they were Jews. If we hate the Romans, we get no pizza. The good news: ho ho ha ha hee hee, he got himself resurrected. I'm not sure if HE did it or his Daddy actually did. I stopped going to Catholic school after the nuns beat me too often. They get cranky if the candle shipment is late.
"So, Jesus swooped the Earth NEVER to be seen again. Except by some fanatic cranks who have seen him on their toast and swimming in their porridge. Easter celebrates either the resurrection and him fleeing the Earth, or the fact that when he fled the planet, he didn't take all the marshmallows, and now we have so many we can shape them like Eggs and Bunnies. Wheee!
"Shauna Easter looks a bit like my old friend Shauna Cuntwell, but with normal sized eyes and a less goofy round face. Oh, she also actually HAS the top of her head intact. And isn't that shaved twat ADORABLE? Oh come let ye adore it...if you pay the going Sheffield price."
Saturday, January 27, 2018
Nightmares for Sale
Hello again, Fun Seekers,
While most gruesome shit has already been covered, every now and then, there WILL be a new entry to this delightful blog, located just down the road from the fine city of Manchester. Yes, the town of Spitpool.
What has us spitting a spit-take today is the website CLIPS 4 Sale, which is not a circumcision clinic. It's a place for amateur horribles to sell their shitloads. Er, downloads.
In the old days, the horribles would have to advertise in SCREW or the SAN FRANSCISO BALL and sell their crap mail order on VHS or a set of photos. Some horribles STILL sell this way, using EBAY to pimp their DVDs and their computer print-out junk.
But the REAL action is downloading. That's right, Shauna, set your camcorder on a tripod, then start TALKING. Really. Some of the bitches do not even get naked. They just natter and posture and jeer and sneer and TALK DIRTY and get a dollar a minute for it. You name the subject, and the horribles will be on it.
We all have better things to do, right? Obviously NOT.
Shauna, it was one of your latest insane (and you thought totally innocuous) videos that had me thinking, "wait, isn't there a website that lets ANYONE sell crap? Not just professionals who are actually attractive and scripted in what they do? Oof, yeah. While Clips4Sale does have some professionals, they have plenty of eager amateurs, and the freakier the better. Just ONE example:
Yes, Shauna, YOU may get to the point where you swap your prudery for a paycheck.
Aside from the grotesques, there's quite a market for boring standard stuff. Like the HUNDREDS of items you get if you type BLONDE and SHAVED in the search:
Yes Shauna, YOU may be on this site one day, and hoping that a "search" when somebody types in "Blonde" and "Shaved" AND "Stupid" will get YOU talking one to one to a desperate dude who like being teased, verbally insulted by a marble-mouthed Irish bint, and financially humiliated. Byeeeeeeeee!
While most gruesome shit has already been covered, every now and then, there WILL be a new entry to this delightful blog, located just down the road from the fine city of Manchester. Yes, the town of Spitpool.
What has us spitting a spit-take today is the website CLIPS 4 Sale, which is not a circumcision clinic. It's a place for amateur horribles to sell their shitloads. Er, downloads.
In the old days, the horribles would have to advertise in SCREW or the SAN FRANSCISO BALL and sell their crap mail order on VHS or a set of photos. Some horribles STILL sell this way, using EBAY to pimp their DVDs and their computer print-out junk.
But the REAL action is downloading. That's right, Shauna, set your camcorder on a tripod, then start TALKING. Really. Some of the bitches do not even get naked. They just natter and posture and jeer and sneer and TALK DIRTY and get a dollar a minute for it. You name the subject, and the horribles will be on it.
We all have better things to do, right? Obviously NOT.
Shauna, it was one of your latest insane (and you thought totally innocuous) videos that had me thinking, "wait, isn't there a website that lets ANYONE sell crap? Not just professionals who are actually attractive and scripted in what they do? Oof, yeah. While Clips4Sale does have some professionals, they have plenty of eager amateurs, and the freakier the better. Just ONE example:
Yes, Shauna, YOU may get to the point where you swap your prudery for a paycheck.
Aside from the grotesques, there's quite a market for boring standard stuff. Like the HUNDREDS of items you get if you type BLONDE and SHAVED in the search:
Yes Shauna, YOU may be on this site one day, and hoping that a "search" when somebody types in "Blonde" and "Shaved" AND "Stupid" will get YOU talking one to one to a desperate dude who like being teased, verbally insulted by a marble-mouthed Irish bint, and financially humiliated. Byeeeeeeeee!
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