The Closest Thing to an Asshole - this ANDY MURRAY tattoo

When the Scotsman Andy Murray became the first Englishman (!) to win Wimbledon in over 70 years, the U.K. rejoiced.

They actually, momentarily, stopped thinking about what was going to emerge from Kate Middleton's vagina.

They cheered for what was actually an ACHIEVEMENT that required mental and physical skill and determination. Not to mention the quick exits of Nadal and Federer and a long, grueling match his opponent had to play in the previous round.

In his euphoria, Andy Murray may have thought the applause, the money, and holding a trophy was THE ULTIMATE.

But no...

HERE IT IS, ANDY...

It's YOUR FACE AND SOME ASSHOLE'S ASS.

Some butt-brain gets a very ugly and almost unrecognizable image of Murray injected...and it gets more attention than winning Wimbledon. Tennis? Oh, that's the sports page. An unknown jackass showing off a tattoo? Hey, that rivals a Kardashian wardrobe malfunction! Wow! It's almost as good as a Chinese baby rescued from a sewer. Or the latest graphic photos of some crime victim hacked, slashed or burned.

Let's remember, the average slob has NO connection or interest in a civilized sporting event, but DOES have a lowlife need for attention, is easily distracted by anything stupid, has the attention span of a rodent, and most definitely understands and loves TATTOOS.

Bollocks? Hmm....yes, Venus and Serena would look good. And their father could stand between them on the Willie. Are you listening, Andy Murray? Winning Wimbledon again next year wouldn't get you the attention that a triple-Williams tattoo would! Hurry, Murray, before the asshole who put your face on his bum beats you to it!