No More "MR. NICE GUY" - Arab Helping Welsher Howard Marks

Here's an obit that caught my attention. Colon cancer (very popular these days, thanks to our disease-ridden food, bad diets, and the prevalence of autoimmune diseases) took away colorful Welsh asshole Howard Marks.

Mr. Nice.

His biography, loaded as it is with dealings involving Paki bastards and Afghanistan scum, points to how some sand niggers became such powerful monsters. DRUGS. After all, Pakistan, unlike the Middle East Arab nations, doesn't have OIL.

Considering the psycho nature of Paki and Afghan and other hummus-faced assholes, wouldn't it be helpful if this shit was simply legalized? While it's possible the monkeys would just shift to the ever-profitable world of Internet "spoofs" and "pfishing," at least the average filthy swine wouldn't be carting literally TONS of hashish through airports and harbors.

The fabulous Howie may have provided ME with some hash. Who knows. Back when I was able to enjoy it without ill effects (but not to the excess of getting high and listening to NICE, ELP, Deep Purple or Sunshine Pop) this guy was sucking up to Mohammed Durrani, a Pakistani hashish weasel.

Soon Marks knew all the sleazy tricks, including stowing hash inside the furniture of Pakistani diplomats who could move freely all over the world. Marks was making more in a week than most make in a year, but the Paki bastards took too high a percentage. SO...Marks joined up with the lovable Irish Republican Army. You know the ones for whom Macca sang, "Give Ireland back to the Irish, so I can get more marijuana that way."

What a wonderful world: hashish from Kabul smuggled into Ireland, then Ferry (no no, to WALES, not across the Mercy) and then drive all over London hawking the shit. With some of it reaching America, of course.

Things get awfully cute. In the 70's, while making £50,000 per hash shipment (and my little hash pipe accounting for $5 or $10 of it, maybe), Mr. Nice (a fake passport identity) was recruited by MI6 to give 'em information on some more obnoxious and higher profile dealers. Happily, Howie's ratting to authorities didn't stop HIM from getting bigger and bigger. He smuggled drugs "in the music equipment of fictional British pop groups that were supposed to be touring" America. Why sell to a few million in England when there's MANY MORE in America? Ha!

Christ, imagine the easy bribing involved so that customs officials don't check THE MUSICAL EQUIPMENT OF BRITISH ROCK GROUPS for drugs! I wonder if the "Fictious" rock groups included Boko Haram, which most people never heard of, since their sullen prick of a lead singer was elusive about doing interviews.

Mr. Nice continued his colorful lifestyle through the 80's, adding Nepal to his list of slimy nations full of religious fanatics who figured Allah didn't mind drug trafficking. Married with three kids, he could boast of ever bigger "deals" including a huge shipment to America that put £300,000 in his pocket. He was pals with members of organized crime, from the slanties of the Yakuza to the Mafia slobs with pasta sauce on their shirts. And yes, he was making deals that put millions of dollars into the hands of the Palestine Liberation Organization. Yassir Arafat was killing Jews thanks to drug money. According to Mr. Nice, even the Nepalese monks were in on the corruption, so it wasn't just violent religious fanatics but those sanctimonious faggots in the orange satin robes.

Mr. Nice kept out of trouble mostly by ratting on other drug dealers and by bribes. When he did get arrested and jailed, SOMEONE was around to persuade a judge to commute the sentence to "time served." And so it went, till he FINALLY ran afoul of American authorities in 1990. He still had his charm. He skipped away in 1995, his 25 year sentence shrunk to five. He moved back to Great Britain, rich enough to enjoy his cancer-producing fatty and sugary foods, and famous enough to wander around holding up a copy of his fabulous self-promoting autobiography. Is it possible his over-indulgence in smokeables helped start a cancer in his gut? The bottom line is his bottom began to cause him distress and he is now DEAD.

Perhaps he'll be cremated and a few people will sprinkle him in with some dope and smoke him. He enjoyed life, had lots of adventures, and provided lots of money for terrorists. Nice going, Mr. Nice.