Yes, every fuckhead on Farcebook, every twit on Twatter is saying, "Now I know that doves cry" and "I'm weeping Purple Rain" and blah blah blah.
Yes, every celebrity has had to sob and squeal about how this is the end of the world.
Even big ugly fat dumb Aretha Franklin had to declare she thought Prince died of the ZIKA virus. That put her ahead of BONO and his dopey band in the STUPID STATEMENT department.
But a few truly fine moments of POOP CULTURE must be chronicled here.
First off, Mr. Race Card himself, blowhard weasel Al Sharpton had to get attention for himself. He declared that Prince was a humanitarian who quietly gave money to the family of poor Trayyyyyyvon.
Right, Prince, like Obama had that "it could've been ME" vibe. Except, they wouldn't be so stupid as to trespass on private property wearing a hoodie, act like a fucking thug, and actually start a fight with somebody who was a security guard. Oh, but Trayyyyvon didn't think the security guard was armed when he tackled him to the ground. Oops. Big mistake, Trayyyyyyvon.
Sharpton is the loudmouth pest who, for 20 or 30 years now, has always grabbed the spotlight at any racially-charged event, taking the microphone to howl and bellow. Doesn't matter if the nigga be right or wrong. Let's forget the HOAX of Tawana Brawley pretending white cops raped her. There he is, shouting and barking, and never an apology when he's wrong.
This fuckhead is such a media whore, a lot of black families pointedly tell him to STAY AWAY, and not use a loved one's funeral as an excuse to race bait. My question is how much of Prince's anonymous donation actually went to Trayyyyvon's family? Sharpton could pretty much make up a figure. Did Trayyyyvon's family actually see the check? Slippery Sharpton is a "reverend" who doesn't pay taxes, and has managed to dodge any and all investigations. In fact, nobody would dare bother, because, of course, Sharpton would scream, "They're trying to take me down because I'm black!"
Meanwhile, in another part of the time warp, the Daily News trumpeted that Prince was the GREATEST MUSICIAN THAT MINNESOTA EVER PRODUCED. SO FUCK BOB DYLAN.
First off, who the fuck cares?
The writer, like Gersh Kuntzman, is just another Daily News nerd who has a quota to fill, and better write something or get fired. So he writes first and thinks later.
The excuse here is that Bob Dylan left Minnesota, and Prince stayed to be the big fish in a dull state. Oooh, come to Minnesota, where it's freezing in the winter and loaded with bugs in the summer, and maybe you can drive somewhere and see Prince's fabulous MANSION.
Whatever. You'd think nobody would be as stupid as to compare Bob Dylan and Prince. But there you are. A Daily News writer did.
Funny thing: the King of Stupid (Justin Bieber) got it right.
The Biebs probably didn't mind all the zillion Tweets and Quivers and Whines and Moans about the fabulous PRINCE, but one jackass had the nerve to suggest that the death of PRINCE meant there were no more great performers alive in the music world.
Have you ever SEEN this fucking Prince? Mostly he wears some garish mutation from the Sgt. Pepper or Victoria's Secret collection, and either stands around being coy, or goes into some epileptic fit that seems like a steal from Little Richard or Michael Jackson, or both. He's not such a fabulous performer.
What retard would whine that the world has come to an end because a 57 year-old androgyne isn't performing anymore? Some limp dick named Watt. Never heard of the fool.
Justin Bieber did what you'd expect. He said, in essence, there were still plenty of great performers around.
OOOOOOOOOH, insensitive!
Justin, you're right. Prince was NOT the last great performer.
At least Biebs didn't say Prince wasn't a great performer at all. I didn't think he was, but retards who are easily impressed with funk-pop shit think so. But was he alone? Of course not. Even if you hate their fucking music, you have to admit: KISS puts on a show, and Viley Virus and Madonna and Lady Googoo. LOTS of people put on shows. You could even say that elderly Paul McCartney, Billy Joel and Elton John all give you value for money. All alone, Eleanor McEvoy puts on one hell of a show, with a lot of variety. How about Mylene Farmer who can make an entire stadium roar? Loathesome Broooose puts on a show.
I can't stand Biebs, so I have no idea whether HE is a great performer or not. Obviously he was insulted by the notion that he's not as entertaining as The Purple One. But he didn't say, "I'm just as good as Prince." He just said Prince wasn't the last great performer. As in, GROW UP. As in CURB YOUR WHINING. As in TOMORROW'S ANOTHER DAY and maybe within a week or two you'll be buying tickets to see U2 or Adele and declare "What a show!!!!"
Lastly, to cheer things up...CHEERIOS.
Oh, the poor fucking fools who cobble together tainted wheat and cardboard and manufacture CHEERIOS, a heavily processed CEREAL.
It turns out that the company that makes CHEERIOS is headquartered in Minnesota. So, they wanted to salute one of their own. But...what kind of drones work in a CHEERIOS factory? Dumb ones.
The Tweet:
Beyond lame, they had to dot the i with a fucking CHEERIO.
Well, Cheerio, Pip Pip, and Prince is going to rot. They're doing an autopsy to discover why the fuck a guy who comes off a plane with flu symptoms, manages to appear at a concert and tell a crowd not to pray for him, manages to be seen riding a bicycle, but...ends up dropping dead.
It would seem like this fool didn't understand what pneumonia is, or whatever type of flu was filling up his lungs and poisoning his system. Here's a guy who could've gotten himself a fleet of doctors, and cordoned off an entire wing of a hospital for himself. Instead, he stayed in his fabulous mansion in Minnesota (one that has an ELEVATOR in it) and ended up dead.
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