Daniel "Super Fan" Asshole No Longer Wasting Space

There was a girl dying of brain cancer. She went to school. She fulfilled her dream of playing on her basketball team. She scored a goal, despite being not very good in the first place, and weakened by her ailment. Hooray. Her story was heart warming. A while later, she died.

The story of "Super Fan" Daniel Asshole is the reverse. He will not be missed.

Here was another "let's all wear our hearts on our sleeve for somebody dying" story, except it wasn't a little kid being brave. It wasn't a girl simply going about her business. It was about a 32 year-old fuckhead with a "Star Wars" fetish.

PLENTY of people are dying young, and know it, and they don't bitch to the media about it, especially for an absolutely stupid reason, like "I wanna see a sci-fi movie before I go."

What was he going to do with his life...dress up as Darth Vader on Halloween?

Daniel was just another clueless fool until his idiot wife and various nerds "campaigned" to have his DYING WISH FULFILLED. What was it? To fuck Viley Virus? To power a wheelchair over to the Grand Canyon? To visit The Vatican? Nah, he wanted to SEE THE NEW STAR WARS MOVIE.

Jesus Fucking Christ.

This was a fucking joke in a 3 Stooges movie. Larry is about to be executed. He says, "I can't die, I haven't seen "The Jolson Story" yet!"

Thanks to SOCIAL DISEASE MEDIA, and sensing the brilliant publicity it would generate, the great God Disney allowed the "Super Fan" to see the fucking film.

I'm only surprised nerds aren't injecting themselves with AIDS and EBOLA so they too, can get a sneak look at the fucking film.

You should say something good about the dead. He's dead. GOOD.

Imagine if he had lingered around for an entire year. Imagine if, like Valerie Harper, he ended up NOT being terminally ill at all. How angry would his nerdy cohorts have been? They would've been wishing him dead!

But since he actually, no fooling, DIED, the fucking SOCIAL DISEASE MEDIA is all a'Twitter about this "Super Fan," and yeah, wishing "The Force Be With You Into the Great Beyond."

His asshole wife, Assley, actually had the nerve to have t-shirts printed up? This bubble-headed bitch's emotional response is how sad they won't be taking more SELFIES together????

The idiotic "Star Wars" jackasses and Comic Con queers who have made this a big story would not have been interested if this guy had wished for something normal. He could've wished to see his granny, or to be given a chance to have his songs released on Spotify, or asked to be at a peace conference between Putin and Obama. But who'd care if this jerk with tubes up his nose blinked and said, "Thanks to me, you two are in the same room. Shake hands and understand that you can prevent people dying."

Nah. Thousands of retards are a'Twitter saluting a dumbass who wanted to see the new "Star Wars" film.

If you knew you were dying, I think watching a fucking MOVIE would be the LAST thing on your bucket list. But sci-fi fans are not living meaningful lives. I wish more of them were not living at all. They do NO good for this fucking planet except put money in the hands of Disney and pimply cretins who sell comic books.

Caitlyn Jenner is probably squatting on her toilet in a rage: "Why wasn't his last wish to dance with me?"