FUCK an AUTHOR for $1.84

EBAY is where "little criminals" play their games.

The people who swipe a few dimes out of the collection plate, or put down the wrong change and take THREE newspapers from the blind vendor, are happily pulling their scams on EBAY.

How about the cocksucker who grabs PDF-MOBI-EPUB shit off Kickass or Pirate Bay, and then snickers and puts up an ad on EBAY as a "BUY IT NOW" for chump change?

Ha ha ho ho hee hee! Mmmm, by GOD how the money rolls in:

It's bad enough that authors only make a buck or two on a book they write, and FEW sell more than 500 or 1000 copies.

Bad enough that if you work hard on a well-researched non-fiction book, on a topic you care about, you might, at best, be paid minimum wage for a year. People scoff, "Well, if there are ONLY 5,000 fans of Ian Dury, or Frankie Howerd, or anyone who wants an annotated history of Hull and Gainsborough steamers or how climate change is affecting frogs...that's YOUR problem. Get a day job and work all night on your pet project."

Many authors do. And they DON'T need pricks on EBAY (and the Internet in general) making things worse.

EBAY not only allows abuse, they encourage it. They have one lone rule on "digitally delivered" goods. Sellers try to get around it with a "bottom line" caveat about OWNING COPYRIGHT. The fucking NERVE:

How'd you like to call up an EBAY potato-head and have to debate the obvious? That saying "ATTENTION EBAY STAFF...I own copyright" is a blatant lie and should not be tolerated?

"Hello, this seller is a liar. This seller is claiming to own copyright, or re-sale rights. This seller has ALREADY been stopped FIVE times for bootlegging books. That proves he's a liar, doesn't it? All he's doing NOW is adding a ridiculous caveat so he can keep doing it. This person does NOT own copyright, obviously, to Harper Lee, E.L. James or anyone else."

"Are you Harper Lee?"

"NO, Harper Lee is an old woman."

"Well, then, are you E.L. James?"

"No, she's ALSO a woman. That's not the point. The point is THIS person is not either of those, or any of the other authors, and has NO copyrights for them. What I'd like you to do is CALL this seller up and ask to see his written contracts. He's telling YOU that he has them. He's saying ATTENTION EBAY STAFF, and that's YOU. You are a member of EBAY STAFF. So you should be able to literally CALL HIM ON THIS."

"You need to contact Harper Lee or E.L. James and have them file a report."

"I need not. Not when this seller's been stopped already, and is now inventing a fanciful caveat. By fanciful caveat, I mean he's LYING. He is a LIAR. You don't need penny-ante LIARS on your site. Do you see his record of having auctions removed?"

"I can't comment on a seller. That's private information."

"I know for a fact he's been stopped multiple times. You don't need to confirm THAT for me. Just see for yourself that he's been stopped, and that he's now trying a desperate, ridiculous caveat. So call him up." "We do not call up our members. We sent them notices when auctions are stopped."

"And they keep doing it! I know you call up sellers and advise them when they have been breaking rules, so do it in this case."

"We have a policy by which we warn the seller by e-mail. After several warnings, and I do see here that this seller has had them, we may limit their selling to less than 100 items per week."

"As long as he's bluffing and telling EBAY STAFF he has permission, ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS TAKE HIM UP ON IT, CALL HIM UP AND ASK HIM TO FAX THE DOCUMENTS WITHIN AN HOUR OR RISK SUSPENSION. RIGHT?"

"Our policy is that a copyright owner needs to send in a complaint to the VeRO department..."

Did I say EBAY potato-head?

How could anyone be this stupid, this oblivious, this deeply involved in aiding and abetting an obvious fraud?

"Listen, the ad is saying point blank "we will email book buyers." That's digital delivery. THAT is against the RULES, no question about it, owning copyright or not."

"Can I put you on hold for a few minutes?"

That's basically how it goes. Almost word for word. 20 minutes of this, just to stop a bastard from pocketing $1.84 duplicating a best seller. Even less sometimes, since SO MANY PRICKS ARE DOING IT, and so many people know where to find the torrents.

I should write a book about this...