The MURKY Merkel Response to the NICE Mess

Merkel, the leader of the EU, was the one who forced every country to start welcoming MUSLIM immigrants. Never mind that these were bloodthirsty, unstable, selfish religious fanatics and ingrates, that almost none would even attempt to learn the language of the host country.

One of the few countries to resist all of this, was Great Britain, the country that seemed to have learned something from watching that sitcom called "On the Buses with Muslims...and in the Underground." It had its debut on 7/7. It was a bomb.

Great Britain also seemed to remember a parody of a Beatle called 'Jihadi John,' and some soldier or other who wasn't even a soldier as much as a boy in the band, who got beheaded for no reason on a street at home...a home now invaded by Muzzie immigrants.

Merkel INSISTED that the U.K. take hundreds of thousands of Muzzies, arguing, "What's the worst that can happen? You get no-go zones? You get a Muslim mayor of London who pisses his pants over bikini-clad women in ad posters? You have mysterious cloaked bitches lurking everywhere? You have no idea who is going to blow some shit up?"

MEANWHILE, in France, in Belgium, in America, the Muzzies proved to be the ONLY religion where crackpots were indulging in mass murder. One of the latest ones, in Nice, had her muttering to Boris Johnson, or some other silly-looking British diplomat, "Here's ANOTHER NICE MUZZIE..." Because, after all, if that Muzzie in NICE had emigrated to England, the incident would not have happened. Or, it would not have happened in Nice, where it traumatised that lovable nose-flute named Bono.

But no soon could big fat Merkel get out her "Another NICE Muzzie" remark, than one of Himmler's relatives burst in with a message that a German-Muslim asshole had begun slaughtering innocent people in a Munich McDonalds. Gee, a little bit closer to home!

"Shooting kids to pieces?? It's not like there's a shortage of chop meat in a McDonald's," the exasperated Merkel declared. "Let's try and find out why this poor Muzzie did such a thing. Maybe every Muzzie should get their own mosque. Maybe white people should just leave Europe to the Muzzies, and move to Syria or something. Lord knows, and Allah knows, the most important people in the world are these self-righteous armpit-faced hummus-skinned smelly stinking holier-than-thou Muslim fuckers. They've let us know that we are infidels and the world would be better if it was the 5th Century and it was Sharia Law and only DEVOUT MUSLIMS were on the planet. We have to appease them, since we blew the chance to tell them to stay in their fucking sandbox and leave us alone."

Munich, it's duly noted, last had a senseless attack from bullies when 11 Israeli athletes were slaughtered by Roger Waters' beloved Palesteeeeeeenians. Said Merkel, "Well, 11 dead Jews vs 9 dead Germans just now. We're still ahead of the game by two!"