No, it's not Eric Idle's hands. This isn't about his grinning Rutland parodies. No, this is about Rutland, VERMONT, where the oldest newspaper is...ready to shutter.
The publisher, some guy named Mitchell, had to make a statement about his "humiliation" over checks bouncing, and all the rest of the recent miseries. He declared that he finally managed to pay everybody. Just how LONG that'll go on, nobody knows.
So goes the game of Rutland Roulette. Mitchell didn't mention the editor he FIRED for writing about the paper's problems. Yeah, typical publisher.
When will this publisher shoot himself in the head? When will he write a note saying, "Gee, sorry, here in Bernie Sanders-land all is NOT right. Somehow, Bernie isn't governing Vermont so perfectly. Somehow this isn't paradise. Maybe we should've gone into the syrup business."
The two amusing things about this story are that a) it takes place in Vermont where The Great Bernie Sanders rules over nothing but happy and contented cows. And b? That the Grimsby Tell-a-Laugh seems to be doing better than THIS newspaper!
Oh, how sad, the Rutland paper is online half the week, and can only spit out paper editions towards the weekend. Aw, just when will the granola-eating staffers have to switch to corn flakes, and instead of organic pancakes, have to deal with two slices of toast made from Wonderbread? Christ, what DO people in Vermont have to do besides tap maple trees for syrup and read the fucking paper? And they can't manage to keep a newspaper profitable? Oh well, the Internet is ruining small towns as well as big ones.
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