STOP THE WORLD! A Muslim in the UK Ate a Piece of Bacon!

THIS IS A NEWSPAPER ITEM? REALLY?

ATTENTION WORLD! NEXT TIME A MUSLIM EATS BACON BY MISTAKE...THE WORLD WILL BE BLOWN UP!

NO, this isn't a joke...like that Monty Python routine where waiters get suicidal after a customer notes that a fork needs cleaning.

THIS was a serious report the other day.

Some fucking school in Birmingham accidentally serves a Muslim a sandwich that has the wrong label...and you damn well better apologize. The entire world has to know about it!

Why? Because Muslims are crazy murderous unforgiving lunatics?

Think about it. There are people who have serious allergies. They could DIE if they ingest shellfish, or peanuts, or too much sugar. When was the last time you saw a TV, radio or news item: "Man served chicken salad that was actually tuna salad." How about the headline: "WOMAN SERVED A DIET COKE INSTEAD OF REGULAR!"

By contrast, most Indian restaurants are so tolerant that they serve beef dishes to their customers. You can get Beef Curry, despite any belief in the "sacred cow."

But this fuckin' bacon story? For fuck's sake, this article went on and on...

"“I felt physically repulsed, terribly upset. I had never eaten pork before and couldn’t believe I was eating it by mistake at school,’’ she said. The teacher said she’d taken the last baguette. Since more than 50 percent of the school’s children are ethnic minorities, and many of them are Muslim, the teacher believes she wasn’t the only one who unwittingly broke a religious law. ‘‘This means pupils were therefore not only given non-halal chicken, but were also given bacon, a meat that is clearly forbidden in Islam and is not supposed to be anywhere near the lips of a Muslim,’’ the teacher said. She brought a complaint to the school’s administrators, who swiftly launched an inquiry into the situation. The school, which was rated outstanding by Britain’s Office for Standards in Education, later found out that a supplier had mislabeled one of its sandwich spreads.An apology was posted on the school’s website this week, stating that administrators were doing their best to make sure this kind of slip doesn’t happen again. “It is an important part of Ninestiles ethos that we meet the dietary requirements of all our students and staff,” Quinn said in the statement. “We apologise to anyone who inadvertently ate one of this small number of sandwiches.” The Muslim teacher who filed the original complaint has left the school."

I like that last line: "The MUSLIM TEACHER WHO FILED THE ORIGINAL COMPLAINT HAS LEFT THE SCHOOL."

How? Did she blow herself up? Did she go back to Crazyland in the Middle East where they bake bread on the top of their sunburnt brain-damaged skulls?

Somebody's imaginary friend said, thousands of years ago, "YOU can't have pig." As if you see a lot of pigs in the fucking desert! THIS becomes one horrific incident in Manchester, and the WORLD has to know.

You know who else doesn't eat pork? The people the Muslims want to blow off the map. The Jews. You remember the President of Iran declaring he wanted the Jews blown off the map? Every single one of 'em? Nice to know it wasn't because HE wanted all the bacon for himself! Funny (?) that if a Jew was accidentally served a ham sandwich, it wouldn't even make it into a Jewish newspaper! If the Jew DIED from it, it wouldn't even make it into the paper unless the Jew's family paid for an obituary.

All over the world every single day, people die of food poisoning. They die from tainted meat. They get sick from mislabeled or badly packaged food. You go to a party and you eat some mysterious mush on a cracker and you're in the toilet the rest of the evening. You have a candy bar that isn't supposed to contain nuts but traces are in there and suddenly you're in the emergency ward.

I had an allergic reaction to a pickle once. My eye got swollen. It blew up to the point where I couldn't see. I didn't call the newspapers to report this. Why? BECAUSE I'M NOT A FUCKIN' MUSLIM, that's why. What I should've done is say, "Listen, if the pickle factory isn't shut down, instead of my eye blowing up, I WILL BLOW UP THE PICKLE FACTORY! ALLAH IS GREAT! AND DON'T MAKE FUN OF MY RELIGIOUS BELIEFS!"

I knew a Muslim bastard who wouldn't eat mustard!

That's a joke, for God's sake...