Dull UK Monkey-Phony SAM SMITH and the GRAMMY scam-awards

Oooh, everybody's spent the weekend wondering WHO WILL WIN GRAMMY AWARDS.

Like they matter.

Frankly, they never did. Not when The Beatles and most rock music was neglected in favor of Barbra Streisand and Andy Williams. The Grammy awards were always a load of crap. It's just worse now.

There was a time when anyone, of any age, could at least enjoy the music. Somewhat. Like Oscar-nominated songs, most of the Grammy-nominated songs might be "easy listening" but you didn't have to leave the room in a rage.

If you didn't like a particular singer, you could look on impassively, not shut your eyes in horror and reach for the air-sick bag.

Doesn't it seem that music is more polarized than ever? More exclusionary? More just plain...SHITTY?

The audience for the Grammy show is now pinheaded teens and lazy blacks who don't feel like going out and looting a store. Everyone else, fuck off. Oh, sorry...trendy fags can watch, too.

What do you expect from a fucked up show that gives out both "Record of the Year" and "Song of the Year." WHAT the fuck is "Record of the Year" for? The nominees are all songs. Shouldn't "Record of the Year" be "Album of the Year?" Oh. There IS an award for "Album of the Year." This makes sense...to nobody but pimply kids, brainless rappers, and fags too busy gargling with sperm to pay attention.

Turning up in both "Record of the Year" and "Song of the Year" categories are: "All About the Bass," a piece of utter tripe by an ugly cow named Meghan Trainor, "Chandelier" by a freakish Lada Gaga wannabe named Sia, "Stay With Me" from fat and sappy plagiaristic UK hack Sam Smith, and "Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift.

Any of that shit worth hearing? No.

Sia deserves to be singled out for being an especially pretentious dimwit cunt. She showed up on "Saturday Night Live" wearing some kind of mutant visor that she borrowed from V. Stiviano, the multi-alias whore that secretly taped basketball team owner Donald Sterling. She turned away from the camera (thanks!) and sang a rotten song while two idiotic amateurish dancers (no threat to Kate Bush in ad-libbed wobbly arm movements) pranced around.

Sam Smith deserves to be singled out for being another British copycat hack piece of shit. He follows in the tainted foosteps of Amy Winehouse and Adele, two totally UNORIGINAL jerks who rose to fame because today's teens have short memories, and when it comes to Dusty Springfield or Shirley Bassey or anyone before 2000, NO memory and no interest in learning. Sam Smith is famous because we all feel sorry for this moon-faced pathetic piece of fake workman man sputum? I haven't seen any guy more ridiculous since the days of Gilbert O'Sullivan and his Irish cap and shaved-sides haircut. O'Sullivan was of course stealing from McCartney most of the time. Sam Smith is just a different type of thief. A pudgy talentless one. Put it this way, he makes Morissey seem like Mick Jagger. That's how fucking torpid, vainglorious and mewlingly wan this guy is.

With such cringeworthy nominations as Viley Virus' "Bangerz" for "Best Pop Vocal Album" (as opposed to Album of the Year which is almost entirely pop garbage, as is "Record of the Year), and Iggy Azalea for "Best New Artist" (as opposed to best attempt at being This Year's Model of Irritating Slut), why watch?

"Best Rock Album" gives you a choice of Ryan Adams, Beck, Black Keys, and two very aging hacks, Tom Petty and U2. How far backwards has "Best Rock Album" sunk for THOSE to be the choices?

Let's recall that the past few years have proven that music has gone downhill. 2014 was the year for Kraftwerk-stealing hacks Daft Punk. This shitty duo won "Album of the Year," while the gasps went up for Grammy performances by crumbly Oreos Jay-Z and Beyonce, and by the ugly crap-brained combo of Macklemore and Madonna, people too stupid to remember more than one name.

2013? This was the year of Bruno Mars, Justin Timberlake and Carrie Underwood. Feeling queasy?

2012? Fat cow Adele won "Album of the Year" while everyone sobbed and sobbed while fat cow Jennifer Hudson sang a tribute to the dead car alarm Shitney Houston.

2011? Oh, the horror of Lady Gaga prancing around to "Born This Way," and the hideous combo of media whores Cee Lo Green and Gwyneth Paltrow fucking up "Fuck You," which of course was performed as "Forget You." This was the last year when any sort of "rock" group won "Album of the Year," but it was just crappy, burnt-out Arcade Fire.

2010? 20 year-old Taylor Swift won "Album of the Year" while media whores tried to snatch the spotlight away: Beyonce, Britney Spears (remember her?) and the kind of gruesome old bitch who calls herself Pink.

I know. Let's NOT go any further down the sweaty leg of Memory Loin.

The Grammy Awards hype this year has included "Pssst, McCartney's going to be there," so older viewers, and soccer moms trying to keep up with their kids, might tune in. Lemme tell ya, it would take more than Macca playing bass behind Kanye West and Beyonce for ME to withstand such a shitty show. Did I mention that award nominees ALSO include Ed Sheeran, Katy Perry and Ariana Grande??