Whether you be SICK or you be da POTUS, go jabber about HAMILTON

Yo, yo, YO!

You know, bro, that the hottest, sickest ticket on da BOO-WAY (dat's BWAY, dat's BROADWAY) is for the rap musical HAMILTON.

No, nothing farcical about the founding fathers of America in blackface, hoopity-hip-hopping around the stage in 18th century lace shirts and bodkins and whatnot.

The men who gave America such stirring documents as "The Declaration of Independence" actually spoke like 7 year-old niggas in nursery skoo. Right?

Take a look at how the review ends.

There's a quote from one of those BRILLIANT and HEAVY rap songs:

"Every city, every hood, we need to rise up.
All my soldiers, what's good?"

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.

THAT is a LYRIC?

THAT is worth quoting?

The jerk at Rolling Stone doesn't say that the ridiculously named Busta Rhymes is a brilliant singer or rapper. Nope. It's those WORDS that are so fucking BRILLIANT!

"Every city, every hood, we need to rise up. All my soldiers, what's good?"
"In other words: Let freedom ring."

HEY, what the fuck is wrong with "Let freedom ring?"

Not hip enough.

A musical that had some white guy belting out "Let freedom ring" wouldn't have gotten a visit from the BLACK POTUS.

What the FUCK is a POTUS you ask?

Thanks to Millennials, 21st Century slang, and cool Niggas, POTUS means "President Of THE United States."

We use OF and THE, because otherwise, Obama would be the PUS.

Aren't we all tired of hipster and nigga abbreviations and jerk-words? Oooh, let's call her ScarJO. Let's call her J-Lo. And let's invent something obnoxious and give it an inane and childlike word, like...TWERK.

And let's name Internet sites and products as if we shoved a microphone into a baby's face: BING! HULU! TUMBLR! WEEBLY! And most definitely, come up with weird words that are supposed to simplify life, except you have to ask other people, "What the fuck does BOGO mean? Er, when did it GO VIRAL???"

So as we get ready for our 45th President, POTUS is now an accepted abbreviation everywhere. Hey, the PREZ is too 40's or 50's or Miles Davis or Lord Buckley. POTUS is more like it for today's scrotum-faced hipsters.

Where was I?

Oh. In Rolling Stone, which naturally has to pretend HAMILTON is the greatest show in Broadway history, a review of the NEW "all-star cast" album HAD to include a reference to when Obama saw the show: "POTUS' vision was so present he should've been listed as a co-producer." Rolling Stone could've just said "Obama" and "HE" but we gotta use stupid-fuck ABBREVIATIONS to be KEWL.

The Supreme Court, is now known as SCOTUS.

Rolling Stone is now known as CRAP.