His take on newspapers: "They're just out to capture my dime."
At one time, newspapers gave you ALL THE NEWS THAT'S FIT TO PRINT, and a newspaper was an education. Now that a newspaper is just "infotainment" at best and "entertainment" at worst, it panders to the LOWEST OF THE LOW.
When I was 10, politics meant nothing to me, and movie stars, TV stars and sports figures were important. Too bad that's now how ADULTS are. The Snooze website, which expects to get ad money so that one day there won't even BE a real newspaper version, has THIS for their front page:
WHAT? The lead story is about DELETED TWEET?
Next, a look at the ugly mongrel combo of a male Kardashian (WHO CARES) and one of those freakish simians cooked up in a plastic surgery lab.
And...let's just say it's JANUARY, baseball season doesn't start for several months, A-Rod is retired, and WHO CARES ABOUT HIS SLUT BITCH PUBLICITY-HUNGRY DAUGHTER?
Below that? A lurid death story that has no meaning for anyone but the woman's family, and the latest antics of a rap-monkey. Sure, anything RAPPERS do is important because their fans are dumb fucks easily lured into paying attention to crap.
I don't expect every day to hear about Trump, or the death toll in the Middle East, but is THIS really the most important things happening in the world? It is to morons.
As to the front page? Oh, it's a COLLECTORS EDITION, I'm sure. Copies are probably on EBAY right now.
"HER HEART BROKE."
Well, why not wait for the autopsy?
The EMT squad thought it was a stroke. Either way, of course, there's no doubt that an old woman sitting and planning the funeral for her daughter, suddenly dead of heart attack, COULD be under enough stress for a vein in the brain to snap, or the heart to give out.
But Simon, who was married to the dead daughter, would say "they're just out to capture my dime," because you KNOW a bunch of cynical 20-somethings, some of 'em unpaid interns, were sitting around the BIG DESK thinking, "How do we SELL this story?"
Right, make it a real weeper.
"Come on, what should we put on the front page?"
"Tragedy in Tinsel Town!" "Debbie Couldn't Carrie On!" "Reynolds Wrapped!" "Debbie Does Dying!" "First Princess Leia and now Tammy!" "The Mother and Child Reunion is Only a Motion Away!"
AH, another Paul Simon line, that one. But who heard of THAT guy? He's not Trey Songz.
"HER HEART BROKE."
Yes, and among the heartbroken...all students of Journalism.
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