EVERYBODY CAN BOYCOTT the USA

OK, Australians, British....let's just say that EVERYBODY can be a victim of American crime, so EVERYBODY, STAY THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

Let's go back to our reliable barometer of slime, shit, sneakiness and crooked business practice...what ends up in the New York Post.

Buried toward the rear of today's issue, far away from the bloodshed...is simple larceny. Bunco. A sneaky racket that New Yorkers would shrug off as "sort of legal," or "freedom of speech," or "just another way of fleecing the gullible asshole tourists who deserve it."

Pedicabs...bicycles with seats for assholes...are, like taxi cabs, mostly run by immigrants. In this case, our Muslim friends, and Russian thugs.

How much above minimum wage do they get? They aren't handing you Burger King fries for $8 an hour. They'll take $50 an hour. $100 an hour. $150 an hour. A nice conspiracy among them...and $150 an hour could be the best deal you can get.

But as the article states, duping a tourist into paying a fortune for a ride involves slick lies, and the old "bait and switch." This tactic is a favorite all over town. On 5th Avenue, tourists are routinely swindled by thinking they are getting a bargain camera or watch from a fancy store...but it's a tourist trap, and the item's inflated hugely in price, or is re-marked with a fake serial number that SEEMS to suggest it's a new and expensive model, OR...the item IS bargain priced but the clerk pretends extras aren't included and adds them for a LOT more money...then straight-facedly adds a surprisingly high tax or some totally bogus handling fee. With the pedicab, the dodge is to pretend to have a horse-drawn carriage, and then hustle the tourists into the cab with a lot of loud, maybe even menacing banter about what a "deal" it is, and how the ride will cover areas that the carriage is forbidden to visit. Blah and blah and lah-dee-dah.

And so I say to you Brits, Aussies, Italians, French...STAY HOME. I'd say it to the Muslims, the Spanish-speakers, Commie Russians, the crazies of Africa and Haiti and Jamaica etc., but most of you are already here...crashing cabs, swindling with pedicabs, dealing drugs and robbing bodegas. Come on, you guys should be targeting all the rich Yuppie scum and extravagant rappers who are such easy marks as they careen drunk and high from fancy-ass nightclubs at 5 in the morning....