Shove a Rat Up Perez Hilton's Slimy Ass? NO NO, GAGA FANS!

Lady Gaga IS a lady.

She doesn't want her "monsters" punching out wimpy gossip fruitcake Perez Hilton...the useless shit lump who rode Paris Hilton's name to fame while trashing female celebs by drawing dicks in their mouths

No no no. Don't shove a rat up his ass.

Don't make him eat a pile of rat-poisoned shit.

Don't bitch slap him till he cries and dies

Treat the grimacing cretin with the respect ALL bottom feeders and fucked-in-the-bottom assholes deserve.

See, just because he's been a sicko who draws dicks on celebrity photos, just because he apparently tried to stalk Gaga and get an apartment in her building, just because he's an even more talentless tool than the TMZ crew and Harvey Levin...please, "monsters," don't go TOO far!

To which a lot of people would say...oh fuck it, GO AHEAD. A jerk like Perez Hilton SHOULD be looking over his shoulder, and getting more than a fetid taste of what it's like to have loonies, celebrity stalkers and unhinged maniacs menacing him. Her. it.

The nicest thing you can say about this worthless jerk who "amuses" by being disgusting about what celebrities look like, is that he no longer presents himself as a preening hermaphrodite. See, he doesn't need the massive woman-hating gay following that brought his obscure website to fame. He doesn't need to dye his hair a freaky-femme color and wear enough eye-shadow to make Eddie Izzard puke.

So Gaga's "monsters" are probably not going to beat the shit out of Perez Hilton. For one thing, there isn't a Lady Gaga fan who has enough muscle to even poke a hole in a half-melted marshmallow. (Although that's sort of what Perez Hilton is)

Perez, couldn't get his limp-wristed minions to go after GAGA. He has no fans. He just has simpering freeloaders who go to his website to get a snarky chuckle about women who can't keep their wardrobe from malfunctioning. His woman-hating crew of emaciated morons couldn't get together and feed one baby mosquito. That's how lacking in blood they are.

What would be the best solution...

Perez and Gaga go down to the Jersey shore location where Aaron Burr met Alexander Hamilton over a century ago, face off with dueling pistols, and shoot each other's fucking ugly faces off.

Today's news item tells the oh so sad story of how a fan in Gaga's building saw Hilton hanging around, and this led the Great Gaga to tweet: "Stay away from me and my family. You are sick, trying to rent an apartment in my building to stalk me. Leave me alone."

To which the trembling Hilton responded, "I am a critic and not a stalker. Any allegation that I am stalking her is utterly false, defamatory and now appears to be putting me in danger."

Boo hoo Hilton, boo hoo. This is what this Frankenstein does all the time...he incites anger, then hobbles away in girly-tears, crying about how he's in danger. He asks to be punched in his fucked up face, and when somebody does it, he won't man up. He cringes and cries and calls a lawyer. Lame-ass twit. Then he snickers when he unleashes his legal team and gets his "apology." He's no better than a whiplash hustler, really.

Defamatory? DEFAMATORY? Anything said about your gutless stupid worthless personality is not going to be defamatory. The stench rising off your reputation could nauseate a fleet of buzzards. Your fucking life is being defamatory, Pussy-ass. That's what you do. Anyone who has fame...YOU want to destroy and ridicule. You are no "critic." You are a sorry excuse for a cunty gossip columnist, that's all you are. You make your money by making people miserable. You deserve a thousand times the misery you've caused others. And one day, asshole, you won't be able to cry to a lawyer about it. You'll be face down. Deservingly so, shit-wipe.

Christ, what a despicable bunch of useless twerps in the world...Gaga, her fans, Perez Hilton, his/her fans...total bunch of useless time-wasting turds.

But as usual, twin piles of rotting garbage like this...they dish it out, then they limp away crying "using hateful language...provokoing of others..." is SO against the rules.

Right, be outrageous, be obnoxious, goad people into anger...then pout, primp, and posture about how TERRIBLE it is for people to be SO upset. Basically this is schoolyard horse shit...make faces and say everything annoying and anger-producing, dare to be punched in the fucking face...then turn away with ugly nose in the air and insist, "Oh oh oh, let's not be abusive" and "don't put me in danger even though I asked for it..."

Which is the worse cunt or the worst dick? When you have two people who aren't sure of their gender, that question goes unanswered. As does the more important one: why don't BOTH of them GO AWAY?