Sophia Loren and her Thrift Shop Tatty-Faced Son

Why have children?

For ME to notice a lack of fashion taste, it HAS to be egregious.

And here's Sophia Loren and her 41 year-old son, who really should ask Mommy to dress him.

She's done up in exquisite taste, and her plastic surgery isn't too freaky. (Why is it that some millionaire women...Kim Novak, Barbara Eden, Joan Rivers...got horribly obvious jobs, while others...Sophia, Raquel Welch, etc. look so good? Bone structure? Over-use of Botox?)

Alongside Loren, whose outfit probably cost thousands...THIS grubby asshole seems to be wearing Salvation Army cast-offs he found in their bargain bin.

What's with the "Fashionably Distressed" jeans? You don't wear JEANS to a movie premiere. This isn't the 80's when it was "kewl" to act like you were one of the masses, or the 70's when Woody Allen wore an army jacket everywhere.

What's with the crappy jacket that looks like it's made from a Grimsby fishing boat spinnaker?

Why is his posture so bad? Is he wearing a nappy?

And let's not forget the oh-so-important STUBBLE that only makes him look homeless and old. He's only 41. PS, nice of Sophia to get work for this obviously talentless clod. She's appearing in HIS film...her first movie in 10 years...to try and get him known. Yeah, call him Carlo Pussy.

PS, any time you think, "Gosh, I have no kids to pass on my legacy," look at HIS picture. He's no "Son of Sophia Loren." Way too often the kid resembles some distant gnarly grandparent. Quite often handsome parents can have absolutely repulsive-looking kids...and stupid ones, too. Consider Marlon Brando's murderous kid, or Michael Douglas' dope-addicted dimwit.

Joe and Josephine Average can raise a kid, or five of them, and they might all move far, far away...and not care how Mr. and Mrs. Average are doing in old age. So why have 'em? The odds that they'll turn out right, share your interests, and even show up if you're in a hospital...are about 500-to-1. They're more likely to come by after you croak, and as "next of kin," take all your precious positions to a consignment shop and sing "by God how the money rolls in."

And probably spend it all on drugs, and not even a decent pair of pants to wear at a movie premiere.