THE UNITED UPSKIRTS OF AMERICA

One confusing aspect of the good ol' USA, is that it's made up of 50 states...and some are in a mental state of confusion or apathy or stupidity. Meaning, what's illegal in one state could be fine in another, no fine and no jail sentence. Want to marry your 14 year-old cousin? Head South, my good perv. Want to legally smoke marijuana, or play high stakes poker, or buy a whore? You'll be welcome in Colorado or Nevada but not in Vermont or Maine.

In Mass o' Two Shits, a perv was caught taking "upskirt" pictures. Invasion of privacy? Loitering with intent? Disturbing a piece? Nah. None of that.

It turned out that Mass o' Two Shits didn't have any law about peeping picture takers, and besides, what was this guy seeing? A woman's panties (knickers)? So what.

Fortunately, common sense led the governor to actually push a law onto the books. Now a grubby idiot such as Michael Robertson will face a stiff penalty for only being able to get stiff by preying on unsuspecting women. Chrikey, Mikey, with so many bints (sluts) wearing their skirts practically at crotch level, do you REALLY need to do a gorilla-arm and sneak a murky snapshot? You really get off on this game of finding out what some anonymous bitch uses to swath her slit? Idiot.

There was a case in New York (Nueva York, as half the city calls it) of a guy who attached a pin-hole camera to his boot (not the trunk of his car) to get uppies, hoping perhaps to find himself a glimpse of pure fuzzy muffin, sans covering. There have been cases all over the country of guys who simply train a camera at an open window, either using a telephoto lens to get at somebody in an apartment on a high floor, or spy on a suburbanite who thought she was so far out in the boonies that nobody'd be lurking to see her poonie. Prosecution varied, as many states believe in "Freedom of Speech" or whatever, or figure that it's up to a woman to keep the shades pulled down, and if she doesn't, then anyone looking through a window is entitled to photograph what he sees...and upload it for everybody to see, too.

Different folks only start their strokes when they get to see the "forbidden." Meaning, seeing pros or amateurs happily (or foolishly) posing in all kinds of positions and outfits ain't enough. The peep is the thrill. Even voyeurism websites don't do it...these guys have to take the pix themselves and then run back home to wank away...that's their amusement. And who knows how jaded these guys are...that they trawl a bus stop or train platform, wander around doing their "uppy" game...and then grimace as they check the results...too dark to see anything...knickers the wrong color...then finally, pay dirt...Pubes, Glorious Pubes!

It would seem obvious to anyone in any of the 50 states of arousal, that taking pix of people walking around in public is ok, as long as you're not going to use the image for profit (such as a corn flakes ad showing some unassuming idiot chomping away in a diner). But upskirts? Or stalking people's windows in the middle of the night and pushing a camera up between a crack in the venetian blinds? There oughta be a law...in whatever idiot part of the country that currently doesn't have one. What next, people pushing a cell camera or a camera-encrusted shoe under the toilet stall? That's taking the piss...