Viley Virus Strikes Again: MILEY CYRUS LIKES TO FISTFUCK HERSELF IN THE FANNY

Oh, that girl LOVES to shock, doesn't she? Here's a funny picture...a rubber dildo shaped like a human arm is "blurred" because it's offensive, but only in one of two photos:

Strange. It's OK to show it, if Viley is holding it up like it's her real hand? But an ordinary photo of the item is censored?? Who can make sense of the media OR its fascination with everything a silly stick-figure pop tart does?

Nice, Viley, you're telling the world you like to use a rubber hand on yourself?

I take this as a very positive statement, and proof that you accept good advice. So many have told you to go fuck yourself.

I use the word "fanny" because it covers both nether holes. In England, "fanny" means vagina. In America, "fanny" means ass.

What's next? How about peeing in a slob bucket like Justin Bieber? Going to bed with a Brazilian prostitute...a real neat-o lesbo angle. Let's see, what else has Beiber done. Egged somebody's house...well, YOU can do that. Just wait for that time of month when an egg is released, pull off your Kotex, and rub your bloody egg mess all over somebody's house like you're using a sponge. That would make a nice picture, wouldn't it? Lots of attention for you!

Sorry, Viley, even you and Bieber combined are a long way from being as inventive about getting attention for stupid, reckless behavior as Madonna was. Madonna, you'll recall, bragged about doing most anything. She practically wrote the book on "Sex." It was only in her later years that she regretted so much of it. That includes throwing herself at black basketball players, only to be used, abused, and tossed on her scrawny ass. She boo-hoo'd about this to interviewers, complaining that she thought that Dennis Rodman and the rest would've treated her better because THEY were "minorities" too. (Women = an oppressed minority group, just like blacks who were put on plantations, beaten, and denied the right to use a hospital or a bathroom unless it was designated for "blacks.")

Gosh, what's next with the viral Viley Virus? Whatever it is, the media will gleefully report it, urging this idiot bitch to sink to a 'new low.' Let's not bother to think that impressionable girls are aping what Ms. Virus does (including ingesting "Molly"). And let's not bother to think of how her slutard antics are playing to over-excited teenage males who may think that all girls should act that way, and all girls should twerk up against 'em because that's all chicks are good for, as they have no brains.

At one time, there was such a thing as an "editor," and even an "editor in chief" and a "publisher." These people, in positions of power, would make sure that their newspaper maintained a level of taste, discretion and decorum. As in, "No, we can't run that photo of the celebrity throwing up after a drunken binge. Why embarrass the poor alkie bastard?" As in, "No, this is a family paper, we don't do articles on crazy starlets rubbing their asses in men's crotches or waving a dildo." As in, "We will NOT give publicity to every desperate slutard on the planet."

Really, why not leave the smelly stuff to smelly people like Harvey Sicko Levin of TMZ and Perez Shit-Eating-Grin Hilton, and NOT grab their content and re-publish it as "fair use" news? Why not have some integrity and NOT feel every issue MUST have Viley Virus, Bieber or a Kardashian in it? Why not have some class, and not fall for every moronic publicity stunt that these air-heads connive?

"It's up to parents," Viley and Madonna and Shitney all say, "to monitor 24/7 what the kids do on the Internet, at the mall, and everywhere else. Parents should also monitor what packages their kids get from Amazon or eBay, because adult sex toys are sold on both sites. Although who would really object to a 14 year-old girl buying a rubber fist-dildo and practicing widening herself for the dream date where she has a three way with a lesbian and a rapper? And after that...coming soon, she'll be seeing the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.