Jesus Freak Hashtag Sob-Prayer Story Tops Kardashian (for a few minutes)

Almost NOTHING beats a pointless, "trending" story on a KARDASHIAN.

BUT...for a few fleeting minutes at least, look what became the top trending story: a TWITTER APPEAL.

#prayingforMark.

It topped some of the other totally useless shit that is "trending" in the world, like Chris Brown's black bastard, or the "hey, I'm GAY" Ian McKellen becoming Sherlock "Hey, Dr. Watson fucks me in the ass" Holmes.

Yes, if there's anything the low-IQ low-attention fat-assed unwashed lazy morons of the world like better than sitting around eating chocolates and using their vibrators and reading about Kardashian, it's getting out the hanky and sobbing about somebody's ILLNESS.

Not just sobbing: TWEETING.

Yes, this is the way idiots occupy their time: going on social media to read about morons and to TWEET about whatever the trending hashtag is.

#prayingformark.

"What did you do with your fat-ass unemployable useless obese white trash self today?"

"While watching trash tv and eating a lot, I multi-tasked by using my cell phone to TWEET about the hashtag of the day!"

"And that was?"

"Oh, to pray for some guy I never heard of. It made me feel GOOD. I'd rather pray by TWEETING, because, Lordy Lordy, I couldn't get down on my knees if I tried. I can't even find my knees under my belly flab. But I...TWEETED A HASHTAG!"

Here's the idiotic story:

Usually, some sob-sister starts this shit: "My little 4 year-old has THIS..." or "my puppy has THAT..."

If it's a BIG STAR, anybody can spontaneously start up a fucking hashtag once they get the news.

In this case, it was the "star" himself! The guy uses Farcebook to ask for TWITTER PRAYERS.

"PRAY FOR ME..."

Huh? First off, who the FUCK are you?

I thought, "Counting Crowns? Is that a typo? Shouldn't it be Counting Crows? Who the FUCK is this guy? Am I missing something? Some music that might actually be good? Should I feel bad about this guy, above anyone else?

So I Googled the name, and instantly found a Christian website where the news about his kidney was breathlessly burbled, and they included a YouTube link (of course) to a Counting Crown song.

OH. This is "Christian" music. Jesus freak pablum. Sappy soap opera stuff, with Hallmark card lyrics. The funny part is that the jerk at the website figured this song, which Mark apparently wrote and sang, is supposed to comfort him. Read the line: "I'm sure this song is bringing him comfort..."

No, I don't think so, Jesus Freak. He's too busy whining on social media and drumming up sales and interest in himself, to sit and listen to his own bullshit. Yes, that's his lyrics on the screen, which, IF I'M BEING HONEST, seem to suggest that the Lord moves in mysterious ways, and if you're fucked over, maybe that's just how God planned it.

This Mark guy is singing about how God gives and takes away, but he's going on social media to tell everyone to pray for him.

And by the way, tell your friends. And if they never heard of this guy and his music, buy a CD or two, won't you?

My point here is not to make fun of, or diminish, some talentless asshole's suffering or anxiety. When you have a potentially life-threatening disease, it ain't fun. BUT...amusement in the world shouldn't be "ooh, let's all sob on Twitter."

You want to send a condolence card to the guy, or leave a "nice comment" on his fucking Farcebook page, who cares. But to blow this up to "Trending" and to have people play this idiot "hashtag of the day" game? That's just disgusting. Not amusing.

We are trivializing suffering, and we are creating bogus "feel good" games with social media. It's one thing when Taylor Swift goes on Skype because some allegedly dying kid's greatest bucket-list wish is to meet her. (Sorry, Taylor ain't meeting with you IN PERSON, dying kid. That's asking TOO much). That might be a "Feel good" story and good publicity for Taylor Swift, and a reminder that we should count our blessings.

But..."pray for me on Twitter?" No. I don't think so. This habit of thinking you've accomplished something just by typing in a fucking hashtag and adding nothing, or a lame "my prayers are with you" or "I'm feeling sad..." That's sad, all right.

It's especially sad and slightly hypocritical, when some guy who sings about how there's a "God who gives and takes away" thinks that somehow, God will do a little bit more if He reads that a person He gave a sickness to is "TRENDING" on social media.

I can just imagine it, can't you?

God: "Jesus Christ, look at how Mark is Trending on Twitter."

Jesus Christ: "Yeah, I never get that, even on Easter and Christmas. So what'll you do, Dad?"

God: "Don't call me DooDad."

Jesus Christ: "You gave this guy cancer of the kidney. Are you making it benign or malignant? Don't you think you should make it benign, so that we can keep up the idea that prayers actually work, and you actually exist?"

God: "Maybe I should talk it over with Mohammad. That motherfucker has the idea that only Muslims are worth saving, and that if they die, they get 40 virgins in heaven."

Jesus Christ: "I haven't seen 40 virgins around here. Have you? I mean, ones that it wouldn't be pedophilia to fuck. Then again, our office is far, far away from the other clouds, especially those clouds where the music is stolen."

God: "Then there are the Druids and Buddhists and Hindus. Oh, and those fucking kikes. Lord knows where they got that Chosen People idea."

Jesus Christ: "Dad! I'm Jewish! Remember??"

God: "This Mark guy is a Christian, not a Jew. I'm a little confused."

Jesus Christ: "So, tell me what you'll do. I can't read minds, ya know. So tell me!"

God: "Tell you what. I'm a sucker for hash."

Jesus Christ: "You mean hashtag."

God: "No, I mean hash. Spam, spam, spam and hash, actually. Fuck this hashtag #PrayforMark shit. Let's go eat."