WENDY in NEVER-NEVER POSE NORMAL-LAND

Oh, it's the "Puppet Girl" again. The one who sang all those Elvis Costello put-down songs.

How is she calling attention to herself and her new album?

Ah, big fat rubbery nipples, WENDY. Mmmmmmmm.

Right on the opening page of the website.

Why buy a mere DOWNLOAD for $10 when for $16 she'll tattoo her name on the rubbery-nipple CD booklet? Mmmmmmmmm!

She sure knows what's important to sell a CD. Not the music. Not her face. She's got...NIPPLES THE SIZE OF THUMBS. That's thumb fun!

Dang, gal, yo, change yo name to THUMBALENA, know wuttum sayin?"

Do you suppose Rolling Stone or ANYONE is going to review the actual music? Or be impressed by "another bimbo posing topless" album cover? At HER age?

Hell, "Vanity" dropped dead (the "Prince protege" was merely 57, which is ANCIENT by rock glamma-girl standards). Nobody cared. Nobody's playin' Vanity 6 shit and Lady Gaga didn't even tattoo a wart in her honor.

At this point, with some of Wendy's fans probably now old enough to need Viagra and glasses, will she even break even?

When you open the CD booklet...do you see...

TWAT?

SHAVED TWAT??

IF NOT, YER SALES ARE SHOT!