They happily took pictures with a psycho.
IS THAT SO SURPRISING NOWADAYS?
Too bad that even having idiot celebrities "endorse" him, this jerk wasn't happy. No, he wanted to date ASIAN girls, and make BABIES with them. And somehow, they didn't want to.
So he began wandering around smashing 'em in the face. Oh, he'd make it a soooo-prise.
See, this guy wasn't taking a chance on one of the Asian babes knowing judo or karate. Nah. He be comin' up to them all quiet-like, and then POW. He'd have a brick concealed in a paper bag or somethin' and BROKE YA NOSE! HA HA HA!
For a week, nobody knew who this asshole was, despite surveillance camera footage, which only seemed to show a smudgy-fudgy black blur.
Now it turns out it's one of those self-entitled, self-absorbed Fantasy-Land assholes who thinks everyone reads his fucking blog and everyone cares about his dramas, and that he's justified with his logic about breaking the nose of any Asian girl that doesn't like him.
Now he be a STAR, right? He got his name in the paper, and his smiling photos with CELEBRITIES.
There are probably a few guys just like HIM who are reading about this and thinking, "Damn straight, dass a good idea!"
Happily, a mutual celebrity-selfie fan has bailed this guy out.
"Wow, I'm SO HAPPY to meet a guy who was written up in all the New York City papers," declared librarian Bill Hoobastank. "He's got a unique name, and a unique talent in making bow ties out of dice, and wow, he doesn't need to beat the shit out of Asian women. My wife and family understand his problem and we want to help. After all, he's famous! We're FANS!" The Hoobstanks threw a special party and, as part of supplying the bail money, THEY GOT A FREE PHOTO WITH MR. TALENTED himself!
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