JARED looks pretty HAPPY doesn't he? Comic-Conjob Fun

Good ol' COMIC CON. Take a little teen alienation, a little self-absorbed sci-fi bullshit, a load of dopey comic book characters and dimwit movies and TV shows, and stir well.

The whole event is basically, "Hey, we hate the world, we spend all our time reading comic books, plugging our ears and eyes into our tablets, and if we go out it's going to 3-D movies and being first in line at a fucking Comic Con or at the Apple Store for a new product."

Woo hoo!

The guy looks happy to me.

He just found a disease he can call his own. That's what D-listers do. If they've got silicone tits they pose for PETA. If not, if they're JARED, they go hunt up something that's not TOO sad or obscure (like burn victims or flesh eating bacteria). Then they come out with "hey, depression is BAD" and pose with an oversized check they hand some "support group" or "charity" that might keep half the profits for their own "operating expenses."

Depression? There's a big difference between depression and the blues. Or sulking.

But all you have to do is say "I'm real sad about depression and teen suicide," and people nod solemnly and figure you for being SO caring and SO sensitive. You've "called attention to a problem," after all. As if nobody knows somebody who is depressed, or had a friend, friend of a friend or a relative commit suicide or go into rehab or whatever.

JARED (not to be confused with the JARED who spent 15 years hawking Subway sandwiches and is now under investigation for pedophilia) said:

"I, for a long time, have been passionate about people dealing with mental illness and struggling with depression, or addiction, or having suicidal thoughts and, strangely enough, it's almost like the life I live, as well."

Yeah? Tell us more, JARED: "These characters that we play on Supernatural, Sam and Dean, are always dealing with something greater than themselves, and I've sort of learned from the two of them that they get through it with each other, and with help and with support. And I, in the past, have had my own struggles of not [being] so happy with where I am in life, which is strange and I think it goes to show. Season 3, we were shooting an episode, and I went back to my trailer to get changed and just kind of broke down."

Poor baby. JARED, you didn't turn up at a Madness concert and suddenly suffer an anxiety attack, feel alienation, see everyone singing along and feel like you wanted to cut your throat? No? You didn't go to bed and suddenly feel like you were sinking into an abyss of despair because your mind wouldn't stop thinking about death, and the inevitable passing of loved ones, and the meaningless of life, and how any moment there could be a life-changing accident to render you in purgatory for as long as you live — and wishing you had the courage to end it. But yeah, you're "passionate" about showing up grinning at a fucking comic book convention full of losers, and they see you and cheer. So great, you lifted their spirits, because it was easy, and they weren't really depressed in the first place.

A bunch of fuckheads stand around flicking their lighters, and solemnly waving them while doing the Nazi salute? I'm not impressed. A bunch of sicko "feelgood" loonies who are "sorrow" junkies and go to wherever somebody died so they can light a candle and stand around and rub each other's shoulders and snifle? Maybe that's better than nothing at all, but not by much. These rehearsed "spontaneous" moments where some guy like JARED cues the crowd to all sing "Give Peace a Chance" or whatever they do...it's drama for people who think "Supernatural" is the truth. It's for Millennials who spend most of their day sneering "WHAT EVER" to everyone and taking selfies, and writing snide comments on Farcebook and mean Tweets and then they go to some public event like Comic Con and bawl because an overpaid dipshit actor with a stupid hat and stubble on his chin tells them to.

Really depressed people weren't at Comic Con. Some Moody Blue people were, battling the Meanies who were getting to the toy laser light swords and other shit before they could, or feeling badly because they couldn't afford the $50 some asshole from "Supernatural" was charging for an autographed photo. Or having buyer's remorse over buying the original full DVD "Twilight Zone" set when everybody says the newer one has remastered sound.

In the end, it's all about THIS guy, you notice that? It's let's cheer THIS guy, let's make sure THIS guy is happy, let's thank THIS guy for even bothering to care about something besides himself. That makes THIS guy so special.

Hey Duuuuuuudes, look at everyone waving Candles! Woo hoo! I got 'em to do that!

Pretty depressing.