Wikileaks in Your Diaper, You Mashable Kiddies

Oh, it's MASHABLE with their second-hand news. The diapered Millennials over there can't report, they just re-write. Let's see what they are wetting themselves over today!

Ah, some corny-named bitch named Ariel Bogle is ogling the antics of that lovable asshole ASSANGE.

"Ariel" is such a hippy-dippy name. Your granny was a Dean Friedman fan? It makes people forget about the stupid last name, BOGLE (which W.C. Fields thought ridiculous enough to use as an alias)

But I digress. Ariel is telling us the great news that Wikileaks is once again stealing stuff because THEY want "transparency."

But gosh, isn't asshole Assange hiding in a banana republic's embassy because HE doesn't want transparency? Like, the details of who he might've raped?

Nevermind. Fans of wikileaks can shout "Ha ha ho ho hee hee, Freedom of Speech!"

Oh, but tomorrow it might be "Wah wah wah! Somebody stole MY upload and re-upped! Wah! No Fair! My Dime bootleg music torrents and all my Demonoid movie rip-off AVI's have codes on them to prove they are MINE, and should NOT be copied! Saying "credit to the original uploader" isn't enough! It's MY bootleg, so it's MY property. What do you mean FREEDOM OF SPEECH? It's MY HARD WORK!!!"

See?

It's Ho HO HA HA when they enjoy somebody else's privacy rape and theft.

It's WAH WAH WAH and "get the mod and admin to BAN that thief" when THEY are the ones ripped off.

Transparency?

As Mr. Ochs might put it, "Transparency is 100% great if you do it to the government, or steal some actresses's nude pictures, or everyone gets the test answers in school and spreads them around. It's 100% awful IF IT AFFECTS YOU PERSONALLY."