Peter Gabriel plays "Shock the Monkey Jew" on his Bike

Here's Peter Gabriel, happily sending Jews scattering in all directions.

If he hits a Jew, he can claim it was an accident. If he doesn't, he'll try again.

He agrees with his shower buddy Roger Waters that Jews don't deserve a homeland. Israel belongs to Palesteeeenians. The Israelis are actually just a bunch of Russian and German assholes who came in and took over after World War II.

Moses and Jesus were, of course, not Jews at all. If any group other than Palesteeeenians deserve the land, it's probably the Muslims, whose religion was created by a true prophet hundreds and hundreds of years AFTER The Bible talked about those pretenders Moses and Jesus.

Singing "Shock the Monkey," Peter drives into crowds of Jews everywhere he goes. "I'm not a schmuck like Bono," he laughs, "I don't fall off my fucking bike-o. Bike-o! Da Jew is hit! Ha! Oh, did I say schmuck? Must be the drugs kicking back in again. I think I copped some LSD back in 1978 from a Jew musician. Would you believe it, there actually ARE such things? I mean, besides Menuhin playing the violin?"

The Angel Gabriel once rode his bike through Jerusalem, scattering dozens and dozens of Jews. Some went crashing into the Wailing Wall. Laughed Peter, "another prick in the wall!"

Peter believes that white people, specifically the British, are perfect. If they went rampaging through Europe, India and Africa it was for "colonizing." If they put down any race for hundreds of years, just sing a song in a stereotypical African accent and it's all right. All is forgiven. But the Jews? They WERE and ARE a terrible bunch. Oh, they might not have formed Hamas or ISIS and aren't invading every country demanding people adopt their religion, but have you ever tasted gefilte fish? Oy! On that alone, they should all be in ovens.

Peter and Roger figure that boycotting Israel is a great idea. It demonizes Jews everywhere. It reinforces the idea that one race and only one race is pure evil. Starve 'em with sanctions. Bring in giggling Dizzy Desi the Toot to give his too too Tutu notion that apartheid isn't going on in Russia, China, North Korea, Ukraine, South Africa or anywhere except Israel, where there's a huge Arab population and Christians are free to view where Jesus walked.

Peter is hoping to re-unite with Kate Bush for a duet called "Don't Give Up...On Ostracizing Kikes." He admits, "It's sort of a race between whether Roger and I can help wipe out Israel, or whether Iran will blow it up first, or Isis, but I'm very sensitive to suffering and I do my best to help."

Israel has appealed to the U.N., noting that if Peter Gabriel becomes any fatter, he might be able to simply drop himself out of a plane, land on Israel, and destroy it himself.