STEALING MUSIC and BEING A DOUCHE? "Well played, SIR!"

The average Internet asshole is a cunt. And vice versa.

Even the best music and most esoteric posts on GOOTUBE or in a forum can degenerate into curses and stupidity.

Here's a GOOTUBE "FAN" who upped a stolen novelty mp3, assuming it had to be the work of Weird Al. The voice sounds NOTHING like Weird Al, it's NOT on a Yankovic album OR on Al's website. But so what.

Even Al's stooopidest fans could tell this isn't him. But not the MORON who uploaded it.

Just as Al has fans, so does Bob Rivers, a retired Seattle DJ who created a lot of novelty stuff. He was far from alone, as many made a living supplying drive-time AM radio jocks with shitty novelty songs they could use for a monthly fee.

"Cat's in the Kitchen" is a hacky one-shot about how Chinese kitchens cook cats. Har har. What saves this, somewhat, is that it's SHORT (under 2 minutes) and the anedoidal pest hired to sing it does a fair job of mimicking irritating Harry Chapin. The joke goes stale well before the repeating chorus about meat "mewing on my fork."

So, fans of Al and Bob (as well as clueless bystanders) all left raging comments.

HEY, EXCITABLE BOOB, IT'S BOB, they all said:

Depressing, isn't it?

People have to try and explain that maybe BOB would like credit for his creativity (if not money, too).

They have to point out Weird Al wouldn't want his catalogue tainted by false attribution.

So we read illiterate bullshit, insults, nattering nitwits...all of it feeding the swelled head of Ego McPoster. Oooh, he thinks, I'm POWERFUL. I can anger people. Let me keep on pissing people off...because I can!

Amid the usual shouts of "FAG" or "GAY" or whatever, this tosser declares that he will NOT give Bob Rivers a credit because he ENJOYS being a prick.

This bratty remarks earns him a cry of "Ha! Well played, Sir!"

As if a) he wrote something funny, b) it actually was a "well played" ad-lib and c) he's in any way a "Sir" instead of a basement dwelling douche bag.

The great unwashed, who find gross jokes about cat meat in Chinese food HILARIOUS, post insults at each other, offer "nice" comments that aren't deserved, and rage over each other being stupid. Or gay. Or both.

GOOTUBE won't take this item down unless BOB RIVERS says so. Who knows if the guy is even alive. Who knows how to contact him. Would he take a half hour to go through GOOTUBE hoops, fill out forms, and risk getting hacked by some vengeful brat, just to make $10 in royalties and have a credit?

The more shit people get away with, the stinkier the sewer our world becomes.