Three Little Pigs Lives MATTER!

Yo, don't be dissin' da THREE LITTLE PIGS.

And I'm not talkin' about the Kardashian sisters. I mean the real deal, yo.

Believe it: gigantic teenagers who are having sex, doing drugs, and beating the shit out of people...can only read a kiddie picture book.

Grade 11? That's ONE YEAR AWAY FROM HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATION and attending COLLEGE!

And these over-sized monsters can't read an 8 year-old's kiddie book?

The NY POST healdine story is a lot scarier than the Rolling Stone one: "The Point of No Return: Climate Change Nightmares Are Already."

It's nice the cocksuckers at Wenner's weiner shop are so upset, they oh-so-hiply used a curse word:

"Historians may look to 2015 as the year when shit really started hitting the fan."

But hey, Rolling Stone, millions and millions of minority students at the age of rape/murder/arson can't read a kiddie book.

"That's the END of the WORLD, know wuttum sayin'?"

Grammar doesn't matter. Punctuation doesn't matter. Spelling doesn't matter.

Black lives matter...hand 'em diplomas and easy jobs. And remember, PIGS matter, because in this crazy Jew-Arab world where those two groups actually agree on NOT eating PIG, it's the DUTY of blacks and Latinos to promote how yummy bacon and pork is. Ya gotta keep the pigs safe so you can slaughter 'em, yo?

Pigs' lives matter...until you be ready for breakfast, yo!

Literacy? You don't need much to text a few symbols for a "booty call."

How do the black school teachers who make $100,000 a year, answer this disgrace? They sure don't blame their teaching skills. They aren't going to be Cosby-like and put the blame where it belongs, and risk being attacked by those lovely school children.

Even if THEY, semi-literate as they are, managed to get a degree, they would rather blame, oh, "the curriculum." Yeah. See, black kids aren't being given reading material that interests them and motivates them. Latino kids simply shouldn't be required to do something tough, like learn English.

Meanwhile the Asian kids, even in the poorest neighborhoods, graduate with honors.

The other night, puppy dog Jimmy Fallon predicted that the biggest summer hit was going to be a song called "S.O.B." Like a dimwitted teenager, he pulled his laptop onto his desk and pressed a button so we could all here 20 seconds of this great song, which he insisted sounded "like Van Morrison or something."

The lyric was "Son of a Bitch! Let's have a drink! Son of a Bitch!"

Something like that. Oh, such an improvement over "Umbrella-ella-ella ella-ella-ella." This is the WHITE guy? THIS is the "Tonight Show" that was once hosted by Johnny Carson, and the big deal is somebody shouting "Son of a Bitch."

So who is expecting more from minority students? Woop! "The Three Little Pigs!" Amazing! It'll be on the NY Times Best Seller List!