What's that SMELL? Oh, Used Underwear on EBAY

The odd stand-up comedian Emo Phillips had a line:

"I got some new underwear today. Well, new to ME."

He must have been shopping on EBAY. This is where pervs happily sell their used underwear. As long as it stinks. Most of the ads, especially in the hidden "adults only" section, are loaded with lurid pictures of a woman wearing her knickers, talking about how many days she's worn them, and how "they will be sent in a sealed plastic bag."

Ebay of course has no problem with this, as long as the ad includes a line, "item is NEW with TAG" even though it's obviously NOT. Technically only NEW underwear can be sold on EBAY or "vintage" items that might be new but were in an antique drawer (ha ha) or something, and to be sold to collectors of "vintage" lingerie.

But now and then an over-enthusiastic stinker gets caught. While Emo may have bought used underwear to actually WEAR, it's likely that the bidders on these two auctions (reported and stopped) wanted to masochistically enjoy a manly aroma of piss and shit and whatever else.

Men are stupid. WOMEN are much smarter. They know how to sell and NOT get stopped.

Here's a lady who DIDN'T pose in her undies, and used the term "pre-owned" (meaning USED) adjective in her ad. To make it more obvious, she offered a nudge-nudge wink-wink in her copy. But the last line in the ad says the item is NEW and that's good enough for EBAY.

Why would someone auction their "pre-owned" knickers and then in the last line say NEW?

EBAY is "just a venue." Like a sewer.