Bend Over Backwards and Pay these Bend Over Fruitcakes

Yes, Dickstarter is LOADED with people with their hands out. 

There are also guys with their dicks out. They say, "We're SPECIAL, we're GAY, we're THE CHOSEN PEOPLE. So give us MONEY!" 

"Hello, We're The Fruit and the Piano. We're HERE and we're QUEER. One of us likes to dress up like a girlie, with make-up, suspendies and a bra, just like his dear papa! 

"We were going to ask for 666,666 but we lowered it. We can save a little if we wear paper underwear on the plane. Yes, the plane. WE WANT TO GO TO AN ANAL GANG BANG IN LONDON. 

"Your money will go primarily for our fist class flight (from home here to London here, but not to Bristol here). We'l need suitable fabulous food and lodgings for a month. We will also be paying for the gangbang itself.  

"Don't think this is just a pleasure trip (the gangbang will be at the Pleasure Dome). After the Four Poofs enjoy us, we will ask them to create a backing track for a YouTube video. We think if we end up with a professional and dazzling YouTube video, the affluent gay clique may notice us and finance a show in San Francisco or Greenwich Village. Whee! How good for US. And you can say you helped. Doesn't that make you feel special?

"There are people who make an entire YouTube video for nothing on their home equipment, and even PAY for their own home equipment. But are they GAY? Are they just egocentric self-entitled tits? GAY is the minority to care about. 

"Do you see a big black football player taking a knee for gays? Not in public, no. In public the football player does it to support black lives matter. Well, how about gay lives? How about AIDS? Black men get shot because they are being uncouth, and if they die, well, being uppity has consequences. But gays are all creative and sensitive, and it's terrible that gays get AIDS just because they want to have sex in a bus station toilet with strangers. Yes, AIDS, unlike a black shot by a cop, can be prevented, but why? It's much more important to have unprotected sex with strangers than try to make minimum wage selling bootleg cigarettes on a street corner in New Jersey. This is why we will give 1% of our Kickstarter money to AIDS. But only if we are FUNDED and have 1% extra.  

"Please, if we have to go to the UK on our own, we might only be able to afford 75 pounds and have to stay at to the Adam and Eve Hotel in Blackpool. We might never get to see the Four Poofs, and instead might have to earn our flight money home by pimping ourselves to a drunken psychic named Petelnegro! Old ladies know gay men can fuck all night, because the idea of actually coming in a VAGINA is just too too repugnant! 

"In cuntclusion, we want to stress that we will ONLY have a gangbang with the FOUR POOFS and NOT with Jonathan Woss. If we can wangle a meeting with Graham Norton, though, we might wangle him! And if we can wangle a meeting with Amy Wangle-staff Watson, we will ride her up the Thames like a tugboat, with her husband affixing a motor to her twat!"