Just another chilling Handjob

You have to have a STRONG stomach to be a celeb and do signings.

You will see cretins, uglies and fools and know that THIS is your audience.

You'll have to smile and answer the same inane questions or "witty" remarks over and over.

And look at this...

You'll have strangers showing off their insane tats.

Yes, I do know the celeb who was greeted with this sight.

What can you do except say, "Ooooh, isn't that NICE!"

Some can at least make GOOD money putting up with this insanity. It's a bit of a trade-off, looking at some idiot's proud creepiness, and taking $40 or $50 off him to sign your name on a photo. BUT...most are there trying to get $20. And FAILING.

Many are just sitting around looking old, seeming like losers, and staring off as goofy smelly people take photos but DON'T buy anything.

PS, to add to your rising blood pressure, a few of the "blind you with a flash picture" jerks who don't buy anything, will walk up with a 3x5 card and ask for a free signature. OR, they'll already have a photo of you they downloaded and printed out, and will beg for you to sign it and either pout sadly, or glower menacingly if you refuse. So you sign.

Yes, ALL the pix for this entry were taken (by proud blogger assholes, not ME) at last year's Chiller convention, which is a good reason NOT to go to THIS year's, even if you are a bicycle ride away or within walking distance. Which isn't the case for anyone.

It seems that unless they need the money, or crave attention, stars avoid these stupid events. There are many who simply NEVER turn up at these things, even if they are co-stars to D-listers who do, and at the same level of fame, and are in good health and could easily show up and spend the day dealing with fans.

Sometimes I think, "I wouldn't go to THAT rock concert or THAT sports event even if you paid me." And I think some sane D-listers would think, "Nope, even if can make a thousand dollars and have some idiots tell me how great I am, it ain't worth it. Bill Hoobastank might want to put his arm around me. And I might run into a variety of benign and not-so-benign maniacs like these..."